Should I get a Dog?

January 8, 2007 · 9 comments

in 2007,Fun,Werty

I have been thinking a lot lately about getting a dog and have been running the various scenarios through my head wondering if I am ready for the commitment it would take to have a dog.

First off I think I travel quite a bit, so I would have to get a sitter or walker for my dog. My mom told me this weekend that either her or my sister would take care of it while I was gone. So there goes that point to prevent me from getting one.

Second, dogs are expensive, they can cost a lot of money to take care of and can be financially draining if you have a low income. Business has been going very well for me so I should have no problem handling the costs of owning a dog. Strike two for me, in favor of getting a dog. I am pretty sure that if I ever get a dog I will spoil the crap out of it, but I would not go overboard with crazy ass dog accessories. I would totally get it sushi dog toys, martini dog toys, fancy dog dishes, and probably fancy dog food.

Third, I have a fucked up schedule. I go to sleep late some nights and early others. Some days I do not see the sunlight because I sleep through it. How would a dog handle a "master" that cannot handle a simple schedule? I actually think a dog may help me get on a schedule. Uh oh.

Forth. I am as lazy as they come. Dogs need exercise to be happy and want to go for walks or to play. A dog may force me to get exercise, god forbid.

Fifth. There are so many choices for getting a dog that I have no idea what kind I would want. I want something medium to large size, but not something that would beat the shit out of me. I want a dog that is smart (would solve dog puzzles), has few health issues, not overly active, and that does not need attention all of the damn time. I know very little about dogs, but I want to find one that is not a lemon. As far as I know, there is no return policy on these little shits, and once you get one you are in it for the long haul.

Lastly, fear of the GAY DOG! Seriously what if I came home one day and my precious pet was "queering it up" like these following dogs:

Gay Dog Boots
Ready for the Gym

CrossDressing Dog
The Cross Dresser

Gay Dog Choir
Elegant Gothic Lolita

Thanks to Designer Doggy – Dog Boutique for the images.

What do you think? Should I get a dog? If so is werty going to be the little mutts name?

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factota » Blog Archive » gardening is not gay… unless werty does it
01.11.07 at 1:48 am

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

1 httpwebwitch 01.09.07 at 1:14 am

DON'T DO IT!

Dogs suck.
they leave hair all over your stuff
they make noises
they smell bad naturally, and you have to wash them so they don't stink
you have to train them not to shit on things
they bark at squirrels out the window at the crack of dawn
they hump things, and worse
they eat disgusting things then barf

for every one reason for owning a dog, there are like fifty reasons not to

dogs suck
birds are even worse, especially big ones
cats are barely tolerable

grow plants instead

2 Jeff Libert 01.10.07 at 1:33 pm

Scary. It could be a sign that you are musing about settling down . . . just a little bit. A dog IS a real commitment. Could be healthy. Get you out for walking exercise. Might meet chics whilst walking. Shows chics that you are able to care about someone other than yourself. That might be bad since maybe you don't want them thinking that. On the whole it is big stuff but, in my experience, on the whole the payoff exceeds the investment. Just be sure to right-size your dog to your life. I'd suggest a mid-size mutt to start, possibly an animal shelter mixed pup. Mutts tend to be durable. My sister-in-law, who works for a vet, swears by mutts. So: plus side = sympathetic companion, exercise, meet chics, get you out of the house, some measure of security; negative = really being up to the commitment, 'cause they're putting their life in your hands and tend to get attached . .

3 Rae 01.10.07 at 1:52 pm

Werty – why don't you try a PLANT first? Or maybe a goldfish? You know, something expendable when the novelty wears off? :P

4 Werty 01.10.07 at 2:14 pm

Rae/Ian, I have a bamboo plant for years now… I got it back when I moved to the US, and I get questioned about my sexuality because I keep a garden in the summer.

The other types of plants I would be interested in growing require a significant investment and are illegal to grow inthe US (c;

Other pets do not really impress me… unless there is some strange breed of fish that I can train to "sick balls".

Jeff… interesting. I think I would be okay with settling down a bit. I am also a fan of mutts. I want something midsize since I have a yard. A lap dog, or a dog I can place in my purse does not excite me too much.

Also I would totally get a rescue dog rather then something from a breeder or pet shop.

I will probably end up waiting a few months just to see what things are looking like at that point. My partner and I are looking at offices this month which would change my being at home 23.5×7 schedule.

5 Jeff Libert 01.10.07 at 5:54 pm

Get the cheapest fucking ugliest office (that you can personalize) because the number 1 rule of starting out in business is . . . keep your overhead down. Overhead kills more startups. It's all about cash flow. Bring a partner into the forumula and it's also about having a partner that is as solid as the lease . . ane then some. Don't want to get stuck holding the bag . . lease.

6 kendra 03.14.07 at 12:28 pm

i love dogs they help u deal with stress!!!!!!

kendra

7 lizzy 05.30.09 at 9:14 am

get a dog they are awesome

8 fuzzy 05.09.11 at 12:51 am

Whats great about a company that hijacks branded products, rides the years of investment in the product then manufactures or copies it and tries to imply that the original maker makes it… Ohhh it's all so subtle… like the masquerade of it being a cool california company… blah it"s a German Aldi family of Companies .. very large and walmart like…. Get a clue… wrapped produce.???? don't you people get it… They don't have anybody's interest here but their Euro…money. How they run their business should tell you about the integrity and quality of this company.

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