brooklynbacon’s Xanga Site
This is an amazing blog which I guess is under investigation…i just wasted like 2 hours of my life reading it…my only conclusion is that the guy is a genius.
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From the monthly archives:
December 2003
Not long ago and far away, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip…but there were problems everywhere.
Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves didn’t produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.
Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out…heaven knows where to. More Stress!
Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys.
Totally frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whiskey. When he went to the cupboard, he found the elves had hid the liquor and there was nothing to drink.
In his frustration, he dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from. Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed on his way to the door. He opened the door and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.The angel said: “Where would you like me to put this tree fat man?”
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SEO Bitch Jake sure is a real seo bitch… or maybe he is more of an seo rockstar. Either way he is the fastest typer in the world.
Seo 1337 perhaps… I dunno i swear him and his keyboard were smoking…I think Jake should learn to quit smoking, do not think his keyword will ever learn.
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look st the original seo rockstar
SEO ROCKSTARS are hot. SEO Rockstars are cool SEO Rockstars rule the damn school. LOOKIE ME!
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Here are the top phrases searched:
– 2 for “aaron mlot”
– 2 for “gi joe”
– 2 for “gi joe psa”
– 1 for “fancy and showy yuppy”
– 1 for “g i joe”
– 1 for “games”
– 1 for “gi”searches for the week
– 1 for “hoarse love”
– 1 for “jenna jameson hardens my donker”
– 1 for “mw”
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– 2 for “mikey”
– 1 for “awesome”
– 1 for “bigfoot”
– 1 for “gi joe”
– 1 for “gi joe psa”
– 1 for “gijoe”
– 1 for “i haven t done it in a while though”
– 1 for “i started the creepy searches cause that girl was searching
her name all the tim”
– 1 for “lousy sex”
– 1 for “might as well start again cause everyone else is doing it”
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…I am still sick, feeling better now.
I ate lots of soup and food, and did not have one sip of alcohol. I left the house only for a matter of minutes and accomplished nothing other that some quality time to think.
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iPod’s Dirty Secret – Neistat Brothers
This is a pretty cool movie that these guys made in order to fight the shitty policy that apple had with the replacement of an ipod battery pack.
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